


Through Misguidance

by 221B_johnlock_st



Series: Diversity [1]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Abuse, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Child Abuse, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Trans, Trans Character, Trans Female Character, Transphobia, mtf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-17
Updated: 2019-09-17
Packaged: 2020-10-20 20:06:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20681165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/221B_johnlock_st/pseuds/221B_johnlock_st
Summary: John Watson did not come from an excepting home. With a father who was violently homophobic and dominating. While John learns about different types of people from Harry, Harry comes to terms with her own identity, and John's acceptance brings them closer than ever.





	Through Misguidance

**Author's Note:**

> There are some pretty intense violent moments, and a lot of homophobic and transphobic language. Also includes child abuse. if you or someone you know is experiencing child abuse feel free to call this number (1-800) 422-4453

John Watson was 9 when he learned what being gay was, his brother had brought his friend over while their parents were gone they were on the couch watching a movie and John had crept from his room where he had been banished. He was carefully avoiding the squeaky step when he overheard the conversation his brother was having with his friend.  
“My parents aren’t cool with the whole gay thing, so I don’t think telling them would end well for me,” Harry said and glanced over at his friend Tommy briefly.  
“Yeah I get it, my parents are only just warming up to the idea.”  
John peaked his head around the corner and just as Harry was about to reply he caught a glimpse of John  
“John! what are you doing down here?” He seemed angry and John only looked at him with wide eyes expecting to be scolded.  
“Oh, come on Harry he can come down it’s his house too.” Tommy said “Wanna watch Jonny, it's about robots” Harry rolled his eyes but allowed John in the room. “I always wanted a younger sibling” Tommy mentioned, and Harry only rolled his eyes and murmured something about John being annoying most of the time.  
“Harry?” John asked quietly after he got settled in on the chair next to the sofa.  
“What, Jonny?” Harry replied without looking away from the TV  
“What’s a gay?” Harry choked at that, and Tommy started laughing. John just looked up at both of them with big round eyes.  
“Well, John” Tom started “Sometimes boys like boys like a boyfriend, or girls like other girls like a girlfriend.” John nobbed  
“Does that mean you and Harry are boyfriends cause your gay?” Harry started choking again  
“No,” Harry said after catching his breath, “I like girls, and Tommy’s got a boyfriend anyway.”  
“Oh, okay,” John said before going back to watching the tv  
After Tommy left Harry called him over to sit on the couch.  
“Listen, Johnny, dad can't know about Tommy, okay* and John looked up at him wide-eyed  
"Because we're not supposed to have friends over when mom and dad aren't here. I remember."  
"No, well yes, they can't know Tommy was here, but you also can't tell them Tommy is gay okay, you can't even tell them you know what it means, okay?"  
"Why"  
"Because I'll get in trouble"  
"Why?"  
"Because dad thinks it wrong, what Tommy is doing. He thinks Tommy chose to like boys"  
"Did he?"  
"No, but you know how dad is, so don't tell"

It was a month later that John found out what the word faggot meant. They were all sitting down for dinner when his dad cleared his throat.  
"So I ran into your friend Paul's dad today Harry."  
"I'm not friends with him anymore," Harry muttered under his breath  
"That Tommy you hang around with is a faggot," He brought up a piece of steak to his mouth. Harris fork clattered on his plate. "He started flaunting it at school months ago, even gone an’ brainwashed another boy into becoming a fag too."  
"Don't call him that" Harry growled back at their father.  
"That's what he is son. A fairy, a fag, a sissy. I'll not have my son around his type. He'll rub off on you. I don't want to hear you've been talking to him. Do you understand son?" There was silence "answer me" he yelled  
"I understand" Harry gritted out through his teeth.

John was 11 when he found out he didn’t have a brother.  
Harry had started letting his hair get shaggy and every time their dad mentioned getting it cut Harry came up with an excuse. ‘The girls like it shaggy dad’ ‘it’s the new thing’ ‘I don’t have time with school and football’. It wasn’t until the hair got so long it was passed his shoulders that his father made his brother get a haircut, and thought they only took 2 inches off, Harry still moaned and whined until their father smacked him upside the head a little too hard and was sent to his room without dinner.  
John sat at the table pushing his food around his plate, he never liked when Harry got in trouble, but this time seemed odd, he fought a little too hard about the hair cut, and there was a little to much pain hidden under Harry’s complaints. While he pushed his mashed potatoes back into a small mound he jumped as his father slammed his glass back on the table  
“Stop playing with your food, or you’ll be sent upstairs with your brother” He grumbled and John brought the first real bits of food to his mouth moments later. Even as he steadily picked through his food he still wondered why Harry was acting so weird. His father stood abruptly and went to the tv room, and his mother automatically started cleaning the table.  
“Johnny, hurry and eat, so I can clean the table.” It was another one of dads silly rules, once he was done with dinner, everyone was done with dinner, no matter how much food you had left. John shoveled a couple more forkfuls of food before he helped his mother clear the table. As they both finished the dishes his mother handed him a granola bar and small orange, “give this to your brother, your dad forgot to give him lunch money this morning” his mom said and he took the two items and shoved them in his pockets. He didn’t mention that his father hadn’t neglected to give him his lunch money right after Harry walked out the door after being rushed out the door.  
He walked behind the chair his father was sitting in careful not to make the granola bar wrapped crinkle in his pocket.  
“John,” His father said and he stopped in his tracks and sucked in a breath “Get me a beer,” he said without turning around  
“Yes sir,” He said as he turned and went back to the kitchen retrieving the beer. When he handed the drink his father only grinned and John walked carefully to the stairs, that he had to stop himself from taking two at a time.  
When he got to Harry’s room he didn’t even think to knock, but he wishes he had once he opened it. Harry stood in front of the mirror that was on the inside of his closet door. He was carefully applying a bright red lipstick to top of the raccoon eye shadow, his hair was half up in a ponytail with little pieces in the front framing his face. He had his tank top folded so half of his belly was exposed and his tighter pair of black pants with one of his flannels tied around his waist.  
When Harry saw him he dropped the lipstick he was putting on and stand in shock for a moment. When he came back to himself he quickly pulled the tank top down to sit like in normally would and scrubbed his face with his hands. Before running over to the door and shutting it as fast as he could without slamming it.  
“What are you doing here?” Harry hissed  
“Mom asked me to bring you food,” he said as he reached into his pocket and pulled out the orange and granola bar. Harry deflated pushing his hand through his hand and realizing he still had the ponytail in before ripping it out and throwing it across the room before sitting down on his bed  
“Could we just pretend this never happened Johnny, just act like you never saw this?” Harry asked covering his face.  
“What.. what were you doing?” John asked it seemed like his brother was trying to look like the girls in his grade with the crop top and makeup.  
“You wouldn’t understand Johnny, your not old enough,” John puffed out his chest  
“I’m not a baby Harry, and I’m not stupid, what's going on, why are you acting weird,” John demanded.  
“I don’t really know Johnny, I don’t know what’s wrong with me okay. I just like to do.” he gestured “That, okay”  
“You like to look like a girl?” John asked slowly, he didn’t want to sound mean, being called a girl was an insult after all.  
“Maybe I do, what does it matter, I’m not.” Harry seemed upset  
“Why not?” John asked he’d heard of it once in passing, it was a girl though, that had started being a boy, but he guessed it could work the other way around. He didn’t even know the boy, he was a few years ahead of Harry even.  
“Cause that’s not how it works Johnny, I’m a boy.”  
“But’ John started “do you feel like a boy?” John asked and Harry paused to look at him before slowly crocking out “no”  
“Well then don’t be one” Harry just stared at him “You’ll be my sister now, my big sister Harry. I know plenty of girls named Harry.”  
“I-I don’t know Johnny, dad would never-”  
“It’ll be a secret, you’ll be my secret big sister dad will never have to know” And for a moment Harry looked at John like he was wild, but after a moment the look disappeared slow  
“Okay, fine, ill be your sister, I'd like that.  
John hugged his new sister, “Does this mean you like boys now?” John asked her and she chuckled, and shook her head, “That’s not how it works.” “okay”

There secret worked for close to 2 years, but Harry got a job a couple of months before she turned 17. John had told her about the boy who had been a girl that he had heard about and Harry found out who he was through the grapevine. It turned out that His parents owned a diner and had accepted their son with open arms when he told them. Harry started working there a few months after she met Oliver. They didn’t mind that she kept her hair long and wore it in a half pony, or that she changed into a skirt before her shift started and kept it there after they were over. They didn’t care that she wanted to just put Harry on her nametag, and even asked if she was sure she didn’t want to put Harryet instead. Of course, all good things come to an end.  
It was late at night, later than any of them should have been up really. His father was piss drunk staring at the tv with glazed over eyes and his mom was putting the last of the leftovers away.  
“Honey,” his father shouted and John could see his mom jump and nearly drop the saran-wrapped plate  
“Yes dear,” John could see the tension in the body  
“Get me dessert” he demanded as he did with all things.  
“We don’t have anything dear” he had remembered his father throwing the last of the ice cream on the ground 4 days ago after he was upset over the lack of chocolate syrup, he knew they didn’t have any left. But he grumbled none the less and pulled himself out of his recliner and stalked to the kitchen. John watched as his mom's hands began to shake. He was 13 officially a teenager and he felt ashamed that he did nothing as his father got closer and his mother averted her gaze but stayed locked in place.  
“Let’s go get something then” He father breathed in her face and John could see the subtle recoil from the no doubt strong liquor smell coming from his breathing.  
“Oh, that would be nice dear” His mother relaxed slightly “We could go see Harry at work, he’s been working there for nearly 6 months and we haven’t gone in while he was working yet”  
John's heart fell out of his chest, he had never thought that his parents would want to visit Harry at work mostly because they never went out to eat. Surely his father would say no, they could just go to the store and grab more ice cream, the store was closer it was cheaper.  
“Fine, ill pull the car up.” John started to panic how was he going to warn his sister. Their parents would come bursting into the cafe and cause a scene, possibly even get Harry fired.  
“I don’t know, Harry will probably be off before we even get there” John tried to think of something better but he couldn’t for the life of him.  
“He works the night shift Johnny, He’ll be there till morning, silly boy.” His mother ruffled his hair as she walked by.  
“Well, you and dad have work in the morning maybe we could just hold off for another day. Just go to the store today.” His mother looked at him weirdly  
“Your father’s in a good mood dear, try not to change that” She whispered to him, and at that moment John hated her.  
“It doesn’t matter what we do anyway it won't last and you know it he’ll be drunk and throwing shit by tomorrow”  
“John Hamish Watson, you will not say such things about your father now go put your coat on.”  
“Bu-” He was cut off by the sound of the side door slamming  
“YOU’RE DISGUSTING” John heard his father yell and they both turned to the noise  
His father had Harry by the scruff of the shirt a fresh black eye on her face, and a skirt around her waist with he clean-shaven legs on display.  
“You fucking fag” His father yelled as he threw her to the ground and spit on her “It’s a disgrace to call you my son” Harry had caught herself on the carpeted ground and muttered something  
“What, what do you have to say for yourself queer?”  
“I’m not your son, I’m a girl”  
Their father scoffed “You have a dick, or have you forgotten” the statement was punctuated by a swift kick to the groined and Harry curled in on herself  
“Leave her alone” John jumped in, and their father's wrath was no directed at him. A swift right hook had John on the floor before he knew what was happening. His head was fuzzy and his sight clouded with black dots. The last thing he saw was his mother blurry in the corner doing nothing and then the black spots connected and became nothing.  
-  
He woke up to Harry holding a bag of ice to his face.  
“Harry” he groaned his head was throbbing  
“It’s fine Johnny just hold still” He could see Harry’s face, she had a split lip and a smattering of bruises  
“Why were you home early?” Harry sighed  
“Some kids from school came in and saw me, gave me the shiner, so Tammy said I could leave for the night. I was changing in the garage when dad came out.”  
“We were leaving to go to the cafe, dad wanted ice cream” Harry laughed a little “Are we gonna be okay Harry” The smile dropped off her face  
“I don’t know”  
-  
Harry stayed for another month, all most every day their father harassed her, and in turn John for accepting her. One night John woke up to a gentle shake to his shoulder. It was Harry  
“I’m leaving, I just can’t do this anymore Johnny”  
“Where are you going?” John asked rubbing the sleep out of his eye  
“I’m gonna go stay with Oliver until I get on my feet, I just wanted to let you know so you didn’t worry.”  
“Will I see you again?” he asked sitting up completely  
“You’ll see me at school, ill give you my address you can come by any time”  
They hugged and Harry left, He did see her at school sometimes, and she did give him her address, but Harry graduated a semester early, and they saw each other less and less. By the time John was getting ready to start university, Harry had a pretty bad partying problem. Their father died, neither of them went to the funeral. John was busy with school and she was busy getting drunk. She had started hormones as soon as she turned 18, and she was starting to look a lot more like the person he had always seen his sister as. They meet in person for the first time in months the night before he deployed. She wasn’t drunk but she also was sober. She cried about not being able to afford surgery and John comforted her. The morning before he left he sent her a check with all the money he had in his saving on it. Part of him thought he was never coming back, he was almost right.


End file.
